User blog:Castiela Winchester/Everyday Heroes In Flannel

I am a South african and superfan who would love to meet J2M and the rest of the SPN Family, unfortunately conventions don't come to Africa, let alone South Afrika and I can't afford to travel abroad. Thanks to technology and the internet I am still able to be part of the SPN Family, my favourite method is through watching the SPN Conventions on YouTube, side bar Jensen & Jared are INSANE.

I was introduced to the show 10 years ago, which would make that Season 3. Now imagine my horror at age 13 falling inlove with a character; Dean Winchester (Seriously have you seen his eyes), only to find out he's doomed to be mauled by invisible monstrous creatures otherwise known as Hellhounds. So yeah, not a good introduction I'll tell you that much.

Anyway I may have known and loved the show for over 10 years, but I was only introduced to Jensen & Jared in 2015 and it was impossible not to end up loving them too. The realism, passion and truth their core selves which is rare in celebrities, especially with those in half of the magnitude of their fame. Let's not forget their craziness and wierd yet hillarious sense of humour.

I don't know about other places outside my country but here there is prejudice against the african race when it comes to mental health, for example if you say you are depressed, they immediately assume you're either; Now imagine knowing these probable responses to uttering the 'D' word when you're a black child. That's me by the way. 3 years ago (2015) I began losing myself slowly and quickly falling into Depression, what made matters worse I couldn't go to anyone for fear of hearing the  above words  uttered back at me and I was right because the 2 times I tried trusting someone enough to tell them it   backfired. It got so bad that one day in the afternoon I cried myself to sleep because I couldn't find a razor in the whole house, I don't need to spell that out I'm sure. But that same night like every other night when I couldn't sleep I tried surfing the Internet and stumbled upon a SPN Jensen & Jared Q&A Panel on Youtube, I do not recall which it was but what I do remeber is that I laughed the hardest than I did the whole year after not smiling for 3 months. That was the day Jensen & Jared literally saved my life.
 * A) Looking for attention
 * B) Just plain crazy
 * or my favourite C) You're bewitched

After I realized that there was something, or should I say someones that could shine a tourch into my whole of darkend dispair, I knew I could use it as my reason to smile & laugh for just that 1 hour or less. Laughter really is the best medicine because after I laughed for that first time in months things didn't feel as bad as I thought they were. The more I watched the videos the more I started believing again, the more I heard other's stories the more I didn't feel alone and the more Jensen & Jared shared about themselves the more I was inspired. ​I literally have these phrases as bracelets (in that order ) and wear them everyday.
 * You Are Not Alone (Jensen & Misha)
 * Always Keep Fighting (Jared)
 * Never Give Up (John Cena, hey J2M are not the only smart people around)

Hearing other people's stories helped me find hope for mine. Which is why I wanted to create this blog, I hope other's find strengh in my words. So not only thank you to Jensen, Jared & Misha, but also thank you to the whole SPN Family, everyone that posted a SPN convention or told their story there, know you took a part in saving me,

so Thank You.

Castiela Winchester (talk) 10:49, January 29, 2018 (UTC)